Heart Screaming

This can be said a reply in a post version
Well I don't care of what it's called

Sorry for unrelated post with some share of knowledge

Me, myself..
No one will ever be able to understand of what is there deeply in my heart
Unless you went through what I went through

My heart screams
No one will ever know

My heart hurts
No one will ever notice

I know this may be offensive, but..
Sometimes I thought to myself

DO REAL FRIENDS EXIST IN THIS WORLD?

Or maybe it was me?
It was me whom had hurt myself?
Whom is expecting people to understand when I didn't tell anything?

I don't want to exaggerate.
I don't want to tell everything I did or even sacrificed.
Till there are some times I did ending up telling what I did though it was just generally

It was hurting when you said that I'm not trying to understand any of you
While every second it was bothering my focus, my studies
I never tell any of you that I can't even concentrate on what I'm doing in class or even in my routine of life
But now, I think I have to say it
If not, none of you will ever know how hard I tried to be the best, to understand better, to love better

I have never tell any of you of this
I cried when I tell what was in my heart to my sister
It was so hard for me to retain my tears when I reminisce of how I tried every single thing without your notice to be the best just like you wanted

It has been two to three weeks
I had never spoke of this though I couldn't do anything right
It was hurting when you yelled
It was hurting when you ignored
It was hurting when you denied
It was hurting you left me behind
This is what I call that "I can't be the best though I was supposed to be your best friend"
And all these caused me to be such a miserable person for almost a month just because of all of you

I'm sorry
I never tell you this
But I'm hurt seeing I can't be by my best friend but the purple girl is with you all the time
When it seems you were more comfortable with her

I'm sorry
I never said this
But I'm hurt seeing you two with your classmates all time and we never had our recess together like before
Never walked back home together as before

All this may seem small, but it gave a huge impact to my routine life

This heart screamed everyday
This pair of eyes held tears everyday

I just want you three to know
How I tried to be the best
To suit to your wish
To suit to your changes

Last,
I need  you to think of..
You and your classmates on recess
But why didn't I went on recess with MY classmates?

You and your classmates went out
But why I didn't went out with MY classmates?

Have any of you notice this?
I have never went out, went recess with anyone else other that you guys
Well maybe there are times I went to the mosque, but it was alone
Maybe I went to weddings, but it was just twice

Maybe to you guys..
"Who forbids you from doing all that?"
"Who asks you to be with me all time?"

Let me tell you..
IT WAS BECAUSE I CAN'T SPEND TIME BETTER WITH ANY OTHER FRIENDS THAN YOU GUYS

If you're gonna blame me more, I have nothing to be said.
If you say you miss me, I don't see it.
If you say you felt bad for me, I don't see it.
All I see was, I'm not as important as I was before.

If you say I wasn't as gentle as before
IT WAS BECAUSE I THOUGHT YOU HAVE SOMEBODY BETTER THAN ME TO BE WITH YOU

You asked me to stop being harsh
I TRIED BUT YOU NEVER EVEN SEE NOR APPRECIATE WHAT I WAS TRYING TO DO

Well..
I'm sorry
You can blame me, but I have nothing to say anymore because I couldn't even describe anything more
Pentingnya ilmu dalam kehidupan

Assalamualaikum semua..
Tu diaaa. Lama dah tak update kan. Dah tu tetiba update dalam BM.
Mihmihmih.
Apa khabar semua? Apa khabar iman kita? 
Meningkat? Alhamdulillah.
Menurun? Jom tingkatkan lagi..

Okay..
Post kali ni, terasa nak kongsi, nak buat peringatan pasal kepentingan ilmu..

Basically, ilmu ni sebenarnya satu keperluan.
Takde ilmu, macam mana nak hidup?
Nabi Adam dicipta pun Allah bekalkan dia ilmu.
Sebab kita perlu ilmu untuk hidup dengan baik.

Pernah dalam kelas Fizik, kami belajar elektrik.
Cikgu tanya, kenapa orang curi kabel ada yang tak kena "electric shock" sedangkan kabel elektrik tu "high voltage".
Sebabnya, orang tu pegang neutral wire.
Sempat cikgu kata, nak mencuri pun, kalau tak tahu apa, mati kena "electric shock"
Haa.. Nampak pentingnya ilmu?
P/S: Bukan nak ngajor mencuri yaaaaa. ;)

Satu perkara penting..
Ada ilmu, amalkanlah.
Buat sesuatu, gunakanlah ilmu yang ada.
Sebab, kalau ada ilmu, tak amal, takde guna.
Pahe dop?

Lagi satu, nak beramal pun kena ada ilmu tau.
Takde ilmu untuk beramal, haa susoh jugokkkkk..
Ada juga salah amal kita tu.

Takde ilmu pun, senang tertipu.
Tu payoh tu..
Tu yang jadi hal terikut ajaran sesat ler, murtad ler, gejala sosial sana sini..
Bahaya tau takde ilmu ni..

Haa ada ilmu, jangan riak!
Bahaya ni.. Penyakit orang berilmu ni, sombong, riak.
Itu lah pesan ustazah saya..
Makanya, elakkanlah ya sahabat. ;)

Ingat!
Saya cakap ni bukan sekadar ilmu agama ya.
Ilmu sains, semua pun penting.
Biar tak tertipu dek kafir.

Konklusinya, ilmu itu penting.
Takde ilmu, payoh. 

Moga bermanfaat dengan post santai ni. 
Maaf segala salah silap.
Adios! ;)
Random

Assalamualaikum everyone.

Long time haven't seen. (British accent) 
Kekekeke.

Well, this is just a random post.

I just changed my "blogskin" and I love it so much. 
Oh yes it's simple and for sure it's PINK!
Weeheehee.

So, dear readers..
I'm afraid some will be like..
"Oh she's posting Islamic posts, on Blogger & Twitter.. But use such a 'couple themed' blogskin."

Oh~
Please no okay. No!
It's just a blogskin. 
I love it because it's nice. 

All the lovey dovey quotes are just for fun okay dearest readers. 
Don't take it seriously.
Told ya I'm a Kpoppers. 

There, no questions on why I put a SJ's members pic on my "Affies"
I can't be putting my crush's pictures there. Darrr~

Oh myyy~ This post is annoying. Haha
So...
Meet up again in next posts insyaAllah.
Till then!

Sincerely
Farah
Little reflection for us

There was once, Prophet Ibrahim a.s wants to use the public toilet while he was out.
Therefore, he went to one of the public toilet nearby.
When he was about to enter the toilet, a guy in front of the toilet said,

"Old man, you have to pay before you enter and use the toilet." said the guy.

Without any words, Prophet Ibrahim a.s cried.

The guy immediately said,
"Old man, you don't have to cry just because you have to pay to enter the toilet. You may use the toilet for free if you don't have any money to pay."

Ibrahim a.s replied,
"I'm not crying because I have no money to pay for me to use the toilet. I'm crying because I thought, even I'm entering a disgusting place such as this toilet that I have to pay. Then how much I have to pay for me to enter His Jannah?"

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Allahu Allah.
Allahu Allah.
May this short story will bring some reflection & lesson for us.
InsyaAllah. 



How Rasulullah SAW loves & misses us.

Assalamualaikum.
May this entry be useful. InsyaAllah.
Let's get further.

A hadith said that once Rasulullah are sitting with his friends. Among them were Saidina Abu Bakar, Umar, Uthman, Ali & more.

Rasulullah SAW asked them
"Do you know who are Allah slaves whom are the most noble by His side?"

One of them answered,
"The angels, ya Rasulullah!"

Rasulullah SAW answered,
"Yes they are. They're close to Allah, they always worship Allah all the time. Of course they're noble. But that's not what I meant."

The friends kept quiet. Then they say,
"The prophets, ya Rasulullah."

But then Rasulullah SAW answered,
"Yes, of course they are. They are Allah's messenger. How come they aren't noble. However, there are the ones nobler."

Once again, the friends kept quiet. Then they say,
"Is it us, ya Rasulullah? Is it us whom you meant?"

Rasulullah SAW looked at them, one by one. He smiled and says,
" Yes of course all of you are. All of you are close to me. All of you help my struggle. How come all of you be not noble. But then, there are ones nobler."

The friends kept quiet again. A long silence. Then, Rasulullah SAW cried in front of all of them. He looked at them, tears rolling on his cheeks.
He said,
"They are the ones who are born far after my death. They love Allah, though they never see my face. They never look at me like how all of you did. But they really love me. They're the most noble ones. They're my ummah!"

From this, ask ourselves again.
Are we worthy to be loved and being missed by Rasulullah SAW with how we are acting now? Wallahualam. 
Think again, let's change. Be the one whom is worthy to receive love and miss from Rasulullah SAW. InsyaAllah. Let's work on together. :')


Tests

Assalamualaikum, hello everyone!

Sooooo,
I don't feel like writing a long entrance for this post.
Weeheehee. Let's start.
Take note that this may be just a self reminder for myself.

Allah gave us tests.
Always bear in mind that tests are in two kinds.
In a good term/bad term.

Usually, some people will find Allah once they receive a bad term test.
Nauzubillahiminzalik.
What a poor slave we are?

Should always be in mind to thank Allah all the time.
Regardless of how great your life is or how hard your life is.

Anyhow, tests makes us stronger.
Anyhow, tests builds our maturity.
Anyhow, tests makes us closer to our Creator, Allah.


The real Islamic lifestyle

I've changed.
Though my lifestyle don't really change 100%.

I want myself to be living in a real lifestyle of a Muslimah.
I want to seek that Islamic lifestyle.

I've wasted a lot of my times with this worldly life.
I've been spreading Islam while I don't realize that I forgot I'm wasting the precious time at the same moment.
Allah. Allah. Allah.

Everyone, whoever reading this. 
Let us leave this worldly life.
Let's live a life with a real life. The real life we are supposed to be living.
InsyaAllah.

May Allah help us.
May Allah bless us.
May Allah lead us.
INSYAALLAH. 

:')

Sincerely,
NUR FARAHDINIE

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